


Of Fairy Tales and Tragedies

by JumpTheThunder



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Angst, Camelot, Dark Emma Swan, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Magic, Pain, True Love, enchanted forest
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-12
Updated: 2016-05-13
Packaged: 2018-06-08 00:54:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,375
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6832288
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JumpTheThunder/pseuds/JumpTheThunder
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The tale of the first night in Camelot, with Emma desperately trying to get a grip on the darkness inside her and turning to Regina for help. Definitely a Swan Queen fic, though this will not have a pre-established romantic relationship. Up until this point Emma will have been w/ Hook & Regina will have been w/ Robin.<br/>What happens when Regina attempts to help the desperate and struggling Dark Swan? What took place in the Camelot arc that Emma is trying to keep Regina from remembering, and why?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

It was late, how late exactly she couldn't be sure due the rather annoying lack of clocks in Camelot, but if she had to guess she'd say it was at least 2am and yet, despite the harrowing events of the past 48 hours, there was still no sleep to be found. Hook lay next to her, his handless arm draped over her stomach as he snored away, dead to the world. When the welcome banquet was done and they'd been shown to their rooms he had flopped down onto the bed with that look on his face that spoke of his confidence in his ability to sort out their current predicament, a confidence he had absolutely no right to have. When he'd waggled his eyebrows at her and crudely implied he could help ease the darkness with, in his words, his considerable talents in the bedroom, she had just barely managed not to rip his heart out and toss it out the window for him to go fetch. It was only after several deep breaths, and reminding herself that he was only trying to help, that she been able to climb into the gigantic bed and lay back atop the intricately designed red and gold comforter next to him, mumbling something about being tired and rolling away from him when he tried to offer his ear to listen to her troubles. After a few moments of silence he had started going on about how they would figure this out and everything would be fine, how he could understand what she was going through, how he had fought his darkness with her help, and that as long as they were together they could get through anything. She had stayed stiff and silent while the nasty little imp in her head taunted and teased, advising that ripping Hook's head off would at the very least get him to shut the hell up for once. Luckily for him he dozed off before he could make good on his promise to soothe all her worries and stay up all through the night if that's what it took.

So here she lay, doing her best to ignore the chill in her bones that had nothing to do with the damp darkness of this strange castle but rather seemed to be radiating from her soul itself. She swallowed a cynical burst of laughter before it could escape her throat, god forbid it wake her irritating pirate. Here she was, little orphan Emma Swan, stuck again in the Enchanted Forest, her companions a smattering of heroes and villains from a life she'd never known, a mismatched family of sorts all fighting to save her. But how could they save her when she was their Savior. How could they possible fight her darkness when they were all so incapable of seeing it at all, even before she became the Dark One.

But no, that wasn't quite true. There was one amongst her party who could see it, who could always see the potential for darkness in her when everyone else turned a blind eye. One lone person amongst hopeless optimists who could relate to this feeling that everything good within her was drowning. As quietly as she could manage she slid out from under Hook's de-hooked arm and off the mattress, the ancient wooden bed frame voicing only a small objection as she went. The stone floor was frigid against her bare feet and her raged dull colored dress hung limply from her already thinner than usual frame as she stumbled from the room and out to the hallway. She had no idea where she was going, the castle was a maze and she'd left the banquet with Hook before the others, leaving her no clue as to where they might be housed. She stood in a daze amongst portraits of royalty long dead and statues of warriors of legend encased in their own armor. Her hands shook violently, something they had hardly stopped doing since she'd arrived in this realm, and she stared down at them with revulsion, terrified of what those hands would do to everyone she loved, to all of these hapless heroes who came dashing in to save her from herself. And Henry, dear sweet Henry, who had fought so hard for Regina's happiness, always believing she could overcome her darkness, and she knew without a shadow of a doubt he would do the same for her. But she couldn't let him believe in her like that. Not this time, not when she was certain it would do nothing but break him in the end. Somehow she had to protect him, even if that meant letting him go, forever. A tear slid from her eye but she didn't move to wipe it away, paralyzed with dread and grief at the thought of not only losing something she loved so very much but losing the ability to love at all. Before she could let her mind wander too far down that twisted path she felt her spine tingle and knew instantly that someone was lurking in the shadows, someone extremely powerful...but not as powerful as The Dark Swan.

* * *

          Without turning around, or really even meaning to do it, Emma flung her hand out behind her, pinning the unsuspecting observer to the wall and sending a nearby suit of armor clattering to the floor.

"Can't sleep either, Miss Swan?" The familiar low rumble of Regina's voice was only mildly strained by what Emma was sure was the magical pressure she was applying to Regina's throat. She spun around and locked eyes with the raven haired mayor, looking rather unlike herself in a long, light purple nightgown, very little make up, and dangling about three feet off the ground. Emma didn't move, staring enthralled as she watched the color begin to drain from Regina's face,  her head cocked slightly to one side as she realized she could quite literally feel Regina's heart racing and sense the very essence of her being. Her eyes fell closed, a delicious warmth spreading through her body the more her fist clenched and the feeling of Regina's life-force beginning to weaken intensified within her.

"Miss Swan..." the rasping words barely registered as Emma reveled in the warmth driving the sinking chill from her heart. Her head lolled back, her mouth hanging open. The feeling was something like that first sip of the a good whiskey on a cold winter's night on the streets, but oh so very much better, and more intoxicating.

"Emma. Please."  Regina's voice was...gentle. Not pleading, not fearful, but rather like a mother waking a child from a nightmare. Slowly, ever so slowly, Emma opened one eye and then the other, gazing again at the pale but oddly relaxed features. "Stop this Emma. Just...put...me...down." Gasps for air punctuated her words, but still not a shred of panic showed on her face.

"I...can't." Emma stammered, glancing down at her hands, a look of utter terror crossing her features before she looked back to the woman she was robbing of life without even meaning to. "Regina, help me. I can't stop. I don't know how to stop." Before she knew what was coming, Emma felt herself flying backwards, a searing pain in her shoulder. She hit the floor hard as the last of the fireball Regina had thrown at her dispersed. She shoved herself back to her feet, furious. "What the hell was that?" she fumed as she stalked forward towards Regina, who was now standing on her own two feet and straightening out her nightgown. "You could have killed me!"

"Oh calm down Miss Swan, you're just fine." Regina gave her one of her perfected looks of complete disinterest, gesturing to the now torn, tattered, and scorched right sleeve of Emma's dress.

"What do you mean I'm fine, you hit me with a fireball!?" Emma could feel the anger buzzing in her hands, but before she had the chance to magic Regina into the next room (preferably through the solid stone wall) she noticed that, indeed, she seemed to be fine. Tentatively she raised her hand and ran it over the slightly pink but otherwise unharmed flesh where the fireball had struck. "But...how...?"

"You're the Dark One now, Emma. A little fireball can't hurt you unless you let it."

It was quiet for a moment before the sound of sobs shattered the silence. Emma's entire body shook and suddenly, in a move that shocked them both, she threw herself forward and into the hesitant arms of Regina.


	2. Chapter 2

Completely of their own accord, Regina's arms wrapped themselves around the broken Savior. She was stunned by how small Emma felt, certain that just two days before, before Emma had thrown herself at the mercy of the darkness to save her, she had felt much more substantial than the frail woman now clinging to Regina's arms with everything she had, face pressed hard against her chest and tears soaking the thin material of her nightgown. Regina had never been very good at comforting others, well except for Henry, but since this was Henry's other mother perhaps the same techniques would work with her. Hesitantly she raised a hand and ever so gently, and more than a little awkwardly, began to stroke Emma's long blond hair. Emma breathing was shallow and desperate, reminding Regina of Henry's during a particularly bad flu when he'd thrown up for nearly an hour straight leaving him weak and frightened.

"Just breath Emma. Just breath." She wove her fingers through Emma's stringier than usual hair, smoothing out knots as she went. She wasn't sure how long it went on like this, nor could she be sure when her words of comfort began to be whispered directly into Emma's hairline, her lips pressed against her forehead as she spoke, but eventually Emma's shoulders stopped shaking and her sobs became sniffles. She was tempted to push Emma away upon becoming aware of how strangely intimate their current position was now that Emma had calmed some, but decided against any sudden movements lest she provoke some unpredictable response from the fragile girl in her arms. She stilled her hand on the back of Emma's head, fingers still buried in blond locks.

"I can feel your heart." The words slipped across her chest, barely above a whisper. "I could feel your heart and your life and I controlled what happened to them. Having that power, Regina...it felt..."

"Warm." Emma looked up at Regina's interjection, confusion in her eyes.

"How did you...?" Again Regina interrupted, this time with a knowing look and a cocked eyebrow. "Oh, right...Evil Queen and all that." Emma blushed slightly, feeling incredibly self-centered for thinking that she was the only one who knew what being consumed by darkness felt like.

"Yes, Evil Queen and all that, indeed." They stood in an uncomfortable silence for a moment, Emma clenching and unclenching her fists, staring down at her hands as if she expected them to explode at any moment. ' _Which, I suppose, she does.'_ Regina thought.

"Hook thinks this is all going to be an easy fix. That with him here, and the rest of you, it'll be no problem to find Merlin and have him get this darkness out of me. I just couldn't stay in that room any longer, it's like even when he's sleeping he's preening his obnoxious ego too loudly for me to shut it out. I don't know what to do, or where to go. I can't talk to my parents, they're worse than Hook right now, and I can't let Henry see me like this. I can't be around anyone." The more Emma spoke the faster her words tumbled from her mouth. She had begun pacing and the clenching of her fists grew more and more rapid with every syllable. Regina reached out, stopping herself just short of grasping Emma's nearest hand, before speaking.

"You can be around me." The certainty with which she spoke stopped Emma in her tracks, and for the first time since she had begun sobbing Emma looked up into Regina's eyes again. It was a moment before she said anything, holding eye contact and looking every bit like a deer in the headlights, though Regina noticed her hands had stilled.

"Why were you out here? It's the middle of the night. Did I wake you...? Did I do something? Are the others awake too?" She broke eye contact to let her gaze dart around the room like she expected to see Snow or Charming pop out from behind a curtain.

"I never fell asleep. And no, as far as I know, Dear, we're the only two awake." Regina allowed her hand, the one she had reached out with that had since been hanging awkwardly in midair between herself and Emma, to drop back to her side. Again the heavy silence settled around them as she watched as every fiber of Emma's skin seemed to twitch and jerk, her eyes having resumed their frantic scanning of the room. She could feel the power, the darkness, coming off of the blond in waves. It was purely intoxicating...and utterly terrifying. She knew all too well what Emma was feeling, though she had to admit that even she had never had to deal with this level of darkness all being dumped into her at once, at least she'd been lucky enough (if you could say that) to have it creep into her heart bit by bit. And it was that very darkness within her that she could feel practically rejoicing now that it was in the presence of such raw power for first time in...well, the first time ever. Sure, she had been around her share of power in her day; Rumple, Maleficent, Cora; but nothing this unadulterated, and she'd be lying if she said it wasn't taking everything in her not to reach out and try to suck some of it up for herself.

"...Regina?!" She hadn't realized Emma had been calling her name, growing more and more concerned with each time Regina didn't respond, until she felt Emma's hands on her shoulders. Emma's fingers grazed just above the neckline of her nightgown, brushing against bare skin, and that was all it took for a shock to fire through Regina's body, bringing with it astounding euphoria. She leapt back from the touch with a gasp, her eyes slamming shut for a moment before opening wide. She knew that they were swirling with purple mist, and she shook her head in a pathetic attempt to clear it away. Emma began to reach out again but Regina held her hands up defensively, halting her.

"Don't. Just...don't." It was Regina's turn to clench her shaking fists as she worked desperately to reign in her magic. When she finally looked back up at Emma's face she found her gawking at her with a look of absolute horror.

"I knew it! I shouldn't be around you, not any of you...no one...I'm too dangerous. I'm hurting everyone. I'm going to hurt everyone."

"Miss Swan."

"I can't do this. I don't know how to control any of this! I can't...I'm going to hurt everyone..."

"Miss Swan!"

"I just need to leave. I have to go somewhere I can't get to any of you. I have to go...somewhere..."

"Dark One I command you to shut the hell up and stand still!" Regina's voice boomed out over Emma's ramblings, the jagged dagger she held directly in front of her gleaming in the sliver of moonlight that managed to sneak past the heavy velveteen curtains shrouding every window in the castle. Emma did exactly as commanded, of course, seeing as she had quite literally no choice in the matter.

"Now listen to me, Emma. You didn't hurt me, you just...triggered something. As long as I have this," she waved the dagger slightly, "you can't hurt me unless I let you. So now let's try to stop panicking and see what we can do about giving you some control over yourself." Emma didn't move, listening intently to Regina's words while her eyes remained captivated by the dagger, her expression best described as one of hunger. "Miss Swan, you can speak now." It took a while before any words made their way from Emma's lips, though she was clearly struggling to form them for quite some time. Tears had begun to pool in her eyes again and she seemed unable to look up from what must be a fascinating spot on the floor. Finally, and so quietly it was almost inaudible, came two little words.

"Help. Me." Green eyes crept their way up Regina's body but never made it to her face. If they had she would have seen the intensely sympathetic look sweep across Regina's face before she plastered over it with her very best cross between the in-control Mayor of Storybrooke and the scared of nothing (or so she liked to pretend) Evil Queen. It was the best she could do considering she wasn't sure there was much she would be able to do to help the beleaguered Savior, but she would damn well keep trying as long as she had the dagger. She couldn't understand why Emma had trusted her with it, nor why it had made her feel so very...unexplainable when Emma had placed it into her hands and uttered the words "Now save me" with that near sneer that was so very un-Emma-like, but what she was certain of was that she wouldn't let that dagger out of her possession while she still drew breath. So now, looking every bit the confident sorceress that she didn't feel inside at all, she drew herself up and swore to herself that she would find a way to pull this darkness, a darkness meant for her, out of Emma.

"Why yes, Miss Swan, I intend to. Now I don't know about you, but I could use some air." Without any further discussion or hesitation a cloud of purple swirled around the both of them and they vanished from the dismal stone hallway.


	3. Chapter 3

"What the hell Regina? Where did you take me?" Emma spun around, furious. Every vicious little voice in her head telling her this was a trick, a trap, that Regina had brought her out here to kill her, or worse, to steal her powers. She was just beginning to take in her surroundings, what appeared to be the very thickest forest she'd ever seen, when an agonizing scream tore through the cool night air.

Regina had realized her mistake as soon as her magic had collided with Emma. She wasn't sure why it hadn't occurred to her earlier, trying to transport them with Emma's magic firing off at random was unwise to say the least, and once they were on their way she became violently aware of just how hard controlling their path would be. Try as she might, they rematerialized not in the gardens outside her former castle but in a particularly nasty patch of the enchanted forest just bordering the water across the lake. And, while Emma had managed to land on solid ground, perhaps due to her magic's instinctive desire to protect her, she had not been so lucky. At first she wasn't sure who was making the horrible, gurgling, screaming noise, until she realized that it was coming from her own throat. Then came the pain, the brutal, roaring pain stemming from the gaping wound inflicted by the tree branch jutting through her stomach.

Emma had turned towards the screaming and found herself looking at Regina suspended at least 30 feet off the ground, her body supported by the limb of the tall fir tree which was sticking grotesquely from her abdomen.

"Oh god, Regina!" Emma gasped out, her eyes taking in the horrific sight above her. Regina was panting, frantically trying to get control of her body's response to the excruciating trauma it was suffering, while she struggled to breathe around the blood burbling up and out of her mouth. Having finally managed to stop herself from screaming, though truth be told that might have been more a side effect of the lack of oxygen than any actual control over her situation, Regina took as deep a breath as she could manage, closed her eyes, and tried in vain to poof herself out of the tree and onto the ground. It was no use, the damage to her body and the effort it had taken to fight Emma's magic had drained her and she simply couldn't summon up enough energy to wield any magic at all. She looked down, her eyes finding an absolutely panicked Emma's, and she realized that her only chance of surviving this was the shattered woman below her.

"Em-ma..." Regina managed to cough out, hoping she was loud enough for Emma to hear her. Emma stood stock-still, green eyes huge, brows lifted and drawn in terror, her mouth hanging slightly agape. She showed no recognition at Regina's words, so she tried again, spitting blood from her mouth before shouting with all the strength she had,

"Miss Swan!" though the effort it took to get the words out made her feel like she was tearing in two, (which, she supposed, she almost literally was) it seemed to pay off when Emma blinked twice and her eyes focused on Regina's body.

"Regina?" Emma's voice was shaky but clear, her eyes looking Regina over, taking in the full extent of the damage. "What...? How did you...? You're...did I...? We have to get you out of that tree." she stumbled over her words, her thoughts coming out in incomplete sentences until suddenly her eyes cleared and she looked directly into Regina's now disturbingly paler than usual face.

"You're hurt" She stated bluntly. Regina almost chuckled at the absurdity of that comment but was stopped by another wave of debilitating pain and something like nausea on steroids that left her heaving up more blood than she cared to see leave her body. When it passed she lifted her head just enough to lock eyes again with Emma, who was clearly trying not to show on her face how dire the situation was. She watched her, this woman who had stood so strong in the face of so many evils, including those far beyond her comprehension, but now that woman, that hero, that Savior, seemed nowhere to be found. Emma looked small and battered. And yet she was her only chance, her life was in Emma Swan's hands...again.

Her body had begun to go cold and numb, her vision was clouding and she was starting to feel incredibly sleepy. Most worrisome of all was the fact that she was no longer in much pain, and though that was a bit of a relief, it also told her that she didn't have much time left. Her head began to fall forward, her eyes drooping.

"I'm dying, Emma." Of that, Regina felt quite certain. It seemed the damage was just too great, not even a Savior could save her this time.

"Like hell." Emma growled, her voice suddenly much closer than Regina expected. So close, in fact, that she could have sworn she felt warm breath ghost across her ear just before her eyes fell shut and the world around her slipped away.


	4. Chapter 4

Emma wasn't entirely sure how she found herself floating in midair next to Regina, but at the moment she really couldn't care less. The shallow, wet gasps coming in uneven waves from the now completely limp former Queen were the only thing indicating that she did, in fact, still cling to life. For a moment Emma was frozen, captivated by the feel of death seeping from Regina's very being. Slowly she reached out her hand, brushing a few hairs from Regina's face and tucking them gently behind her ear before letting the back of her knuckles trails down Regina's cheek and finally grazing her thumb over her lips, collecting a few drops of the blood that stained them. In a move that she should have found revolting, or at the very least disturbing, she raised her now bloodied thumb to her lips and licked it clean. Her eyes slammed shut as soon as the blood touched her tongue, a heat not unlike one of Regina's fireballs raced across her skin and she felt the essence of Regina's magic slam into her own. She could feel the power flowing through every fiber of her being, electric and exhilarating. Her eyes fluttered back open, drawn out of her reverie by the realization that she could actually feel the stuttering of the heart about to fail inside the other woman's chest.

"No, you do not get to die on me." Her whisper was harsh and determined, sounding more like the Savior than she had since...well since she'd insisted on diving into the darkness in place of Regina. She looked down at her hand, still shaking as dramatically as ever, and took a deep breath in a pathetic attempt to steady it. Her efforts went unnoticed by the quivering digits and she puffed out a frustrated sigh. _'Come on Swan'_ she thought as she lay her palm flat against Regina's chest, barely able to actually feel the feeble beats bellow. That's when it dawned on her, as suddenly as her hand stopped shaking.

"Your heart." Her voice was barely above a whisper, her eyes widening as she, without a moment's hesitation, thrust her hand deep inside Regina, clasped her fingers around the trembling organ, and yanked it free. The heart, though certainly blacker than others she'd seen, still glowed a dim crimson from deep within, bits and pieces of the darkness on the outside seemingly peeled away allowing the light to shine clear through. Emma raised the heart to her lips, her eyes locked on the Regina's face, deathly pale and still, and spoke quietly but with unmistakable authority.

"Open your eyes, Regina." Nothing, no reaction from the near lifeless body save for the drops of blood that dripped steadily from the corner of her mouth, falling the long distance to the forest floor below. Emma took a deep breath and closed her eyes, trying to focus on her magic, not the darkness that seemed omnipresent but her true magic, the light magic she had only just begun to trust before all of this madness invaded everything.

"Wake up. Now." A warmth flowed down Emma's arm, radiating from somewhere near her own heart, and she felt her hand grow impossibly hot. A rattling gasp reached her ears and her eyes shot open. Regina's brown eyes met her own, fuzzy and lost, but very much alive. "Much better." A crocked smile twisted Emma's lips. "Now, let's get you out of this tree."

* * *

Regina struggled to lift her leaden eyelids, feeling something...or someone...dragging her out of the endless cold blackness. Her eyes could barely focus when they opened, finally finding wide green ones looking back at her with surprise, and just a hint of cocky self-assuredness that told her exactly who had brought her back.

"Now, let's get you out of this tree." Emma's words bounced around in Regina's muddled brain as her eyes found themselves drawn from Emma's face down to what was held out before her, clutched in her hand. She recognized the heart immediately, instinct telling her it was hers. Still she found herself stuttering, asking the question she already knew the answer to.

"Is that my...?" She could feel it flutter with anxiety despite it no longer residing in her chest, and she knew by the way Emma was looking at it that she could feel it too.

"Oh...um...yeah, sorry." And there was the nervous, never sure of her magic-nor clear on when she might be overstepping when it came to the former Queen and Mayor-Emma Swan that Regina was used to. "It just...well I needed to wake you up and then I just took it. Sorry, again."

As Emma spoke, Regina found herself becoming more and more aware of her current situation, remembering the predicament she had gotten herself into, and the pain began to flood back. She sucked in a wheezing breath before speaking.

"It's ok Emma. You did the right thing. As long as you have that," she motioned her head towards her glowing heart, "and you want me alive, I'll stay that way. Just...be careful with it." A tense silence hung in the air between them, with Emma's eyes locked on the heart in her hands, a look of terror spreading across her features as she realized the full weight of what she had done. She couldn't trust her magic not to literally blow up everything around her at any given second, nevermind trusting it to keep such a fragile item safe and sound...and still beating. And yet, here it was, beating stronger than it had when she'd first ripped it from Regina's body, somehow thriving in her grasp. Regina cleared her throat, pulling Emma's attention back to her face.

"Now, about what you said regarding getting me out of this tree...?"

"Oh, right. Sorry. Honestly I'm not sure how I got up here in the first place, I'm pretty sure I didn't poof..." Emma trailed off, unsure where she was going with this. Regina gave her a look of mild judgment, one that clearly said she couldn't understand why Emma never bothered to work more on understanding her magic,  but it was quickly wiped away by a grimace as her body began to throb relentlessly.

"You're flying Emma. Or rather, levitating. It's very powerful magic, but that's no surprise given what's going on with you." She explained despite her pain, finding the fingers of her hand twitching like they longed to gesture as she spoke, waving off this information as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"So can we just fly down then? How do I even control this?" Emma's eyes were big and questioning, looking like a lost school girl asking the first adult she came across to help her get home. It struck Regina as rather comical that Emma was still looking to her for magical advice when she was not only literally holding Regina's life in her hands, but was also clearly the more powerful of the two of them. Her amusement took a back seat to the pain that once again flared from her broken midsection and she sputtered up yet more blood, trying to clear her throat enough to speak clearly. Emma eyes widened even further, how that was possible Regina couldn't fathom, as she followed the falling blood droplets with her gaze.

"I thought you said you were ok!? Why are you still bleeding?" Her voice was small and tight, her throat constricted as she looked from the ground to Regina's heart and then to her face.

"I said you could keep me alive, Miss Swan, I said nothing about being alright. Your magic is powering my heart, and as long as it continues to do that I will remain alive, but that does not mean that I'm not in a rather significant amount of pain. Now can we please focus on the task at hand before this tree succeeds in tearing me in two?" Her eyes flared with the impatience of the Mayor of Storybrooke and, just for second, she looked to Emma exactly like the intensely terrifying woman she had met when she'd first arrived. Emma glanced at the heart once more before squaring her shoulders and lifting her chin.

"What do you need me to do?"

"I need you to use your magic and, as you would say, poof us back to the ground. Gently, if you could manage." She could see the panic in Emma's eyes at the prospect of actually controlling her magic for just a second before Emma blinked it away and steeled herself for the task at hand. _'That's a good little Savior'_ Regina thought to herself, using condescension to push back the worry that this was going to go terribly wrong. Though, she supposed, it couldn't get much worse than it already was...unless of course in her determination Emma accidentally crushed her heart in her once again shaky hands. She watched as Emma swallowed hard and took a few deep breaths, bringing her other hand up around Regina's heart and cupping it rather reverently before squeezing her eyes tightly shut. At first nothing happened, but then Regina began to feel the slightest buzzing in her mostly numb limbs and noticed the silver smoke (with just a hint of a reddish tinge to it) swirl up around herself and Emma. Suddenly there was the vague feeling of something firm beneath her feet and she looked down to see herself standing on the leaf-covered dirt of the Enchanted Forest. Emma stood before her, eyes still firmly shut and both arms now shaking violently with the effort she seemed to be putting into neither dropping nor crushing Regina's heart. Slowly one green iris came into view as she peered out to see what had happened.

"I...I did it!" She said with wonder, opening both eyes now and allowing a surprised smile to stretch across her lips.

"Yes, Miss Swan, it would seem that you did." Regina found she was smiling too, although it lasted only a second before the weight of her battered body pressing down on her weak and bloodless legs set in and she found herself crying out as she slumped face first into the dirt.

* * *

Emma felt absolutely high with magic as she opened her eyes and found Regina standing in front of her, all four of their feet safely on solid ground. She was vaguely aware of how much her body was straining and quaking with effort, but mostly all she could feel was the power, and oh gods did it feel incredible. Poofing was something she had never mastered back in Storybrooke and now here, on her first try, she had managed to transport not only herself but another whole person to the exact location she'd wished them to land. It was thrilling, this one act making her feel like she could do absolutely anything. That is, until she watched in what felt like slow motion as Regina's face contorted into horrifying pain, a scream tearing from her lips, and toppled to the ground. The euphoria of the moment before was gone in an instant as Emma made a desperate attempt to catch Regina, forgetting entirely the heart she held and letting it fall along with its owner, unable to reach either in time. Her knees hit the ground with a thud, though she registered no pain as she clawed her way to the fallen Queen.

"Regina" Her voice was at least an octave higher than usual and the word cracked in the middle as she wrapped her hands around slight shoulders and turned the limp body over in her arms, quickly moving to brush hair and dirt from Regina's face. Regina was gasping, one hand clenched over her chest while the other clung to one of Emma's arms. Her eye brows were knit together and there was a fear in her eyes that Emma had never seen before. As she looked from those brown orbs to the injuries below the reality of the situation truly hit her for the first time. Sure, it had been terrifying seeing Regina in that tree, but it was almost like things had been so ludicrous that it had been easier to ignore the fact that Regina was barely hanging on and would most certainly have been dead by now had Emma not torn her heart from her chest and somehow jump started it with magic.

"Regina..." she said again, her voice barely louder than a whisper this time. She had yet to realize that she was still stroking the woman's face, long since cleared of dirt. She was also unaware that she was crying until a tear fell from her eye and landed on Regina's cheek. Emma watched as Regina's mouth moved, trying to form words that wouldn't come amongst gasps for air and sputters of blood. Her face was growing more and more ghostly with each passing second and Emma felt herself being overcome with a panic so absolute that she couldn't form coherent thoughts, that is save for one that was repeating itself over and over in her head; _'I can't lose you, I love you.'_ The unexpected mantra rolling through her brain should have shocked her, but in the moment it was the only thing she had, the only thing she knew to be true, and the only thing that mattered. She was lost in the repetitive motion of brushing her fingers over cold cheeks when suddenly Regina's hand was on her own, gripping her fingers and bringing them to her ashen temple. Without warning she felt a rush of pain fire from her fingertips to her brain and Regina's agonizing moan rattled through her skull, though no sound came from her still gaping mouth. The moan ceased and there was a moment where the only thing she could hear was something rather akin to white noise being emitted from an old television when suddenly a small and questioning voice drifted through her head, the raspy timbre easily identifiable as that of the woman in her arms.

 _"Emma? Can you hear me?"_ She stared down at Regina in confusion, watching as the Mayors face contorted in concentration and her eyes practically burned holes through Emma's own, the hand holding Emma's fingers to her temple pushing down ever harder. Despite hardly being able to fathom what was going on, Emma found herself responding,

"Yes, I can...what is happening...?"

 _"My heart, Emma, where is it?"_ Again Regina's voice was loud and clear, fear evident in her tone, yet her lips never moved. When Emma failed to respond Regina squeezed harder on her fingers, a strangled gurgling coming from her throat. _"You don't have my heart. Get my heart! I'm dying Emma!"_ These words snapped Emma to action, her eyes darting as she realized that, like an idiot, she had let go of the heart that Regina had clearly told her was the only thing keeping her alive, and that it only did so because while in Emma's hands she was powering it with magic. She was so busy scrambling for the heart that she'd spotted less than a foot away, covered in twigs from rolling across the forest floor, that she didn't realize the look of surprise that crossed Regina's face upon catching the words that had started up again and played as if on repeat inside Emma's head. Emma managed to snatch the heart up without her fingers ever leaving Regina's temple and as soon as her hand closed around it she heard a shuddering breath roll through Regina's chest as a sigh of relief echoed through her mind. She clutched the heart to her own chest, tears in eyes as she watched Regina's breathing begin to even out. Not wanting to risk another foolish mistake or waste another minute, she cleared the lump in her throat and spoke,

"How do I fix this Regina? How do I fix you?" A strange look filled Regina's eyes for just a moment, something Emma couldn't manage to identify before it slipped away and was replaced by the trying to be cool, calm, and collected expression that Regina used to make people think she had complete control over even the most out-of-control situations. Her hand had relaxed its hold on Emma's fingers, no longer pressing them to her temple but still unwilling to let her go completely. She licked her lips and swallowed back the distinctly metallic liquid in her mouth before speaking, her voice weak and gravelly.

"It's going to take a lot of magic Emma. It's going to be very hard and it's going to hurt like hell...for both of us." Despite feeling about as powerful as a door mouse, Emma responded simply with a nod.

"Tell me what to do."

Regina finally released the hand she had been holding and reached instead for the one containing her heart, wrapping it in her own and bringing it to hover just above its home inside her chest. The magic they were about to attempt was a more extreme healing than she had ever done, her injuries far more substantial and damaging than anything that had befallen her or anyone she'd cared to save in the past. It was something that should take years of practice to master, but given the circumstances it seemed one shot was all they would get. She gazed into Emma's eyes, the blonde was trying so hard to put on a brave face for her, and she found herself touched by the attempt despite the fact that it was a miserable failure.

"I'm going to need you to find my magic. I'm too weak to control it myself, but if you can draw it out then I can guide you. Your magic will know what to do Emma, you just have to let it show you. You have to trust it, implicitly." The fear that flashed across Emma's features at the idea of trusting her magic was clear as day and Regina could feel the hand she held in her own shaking more furiously than ever before. She squeezed it gently, careful not to apply enough pressure to result in the compression of her already bruised and aching heart.

"Regina, I don't know if I can do that. My magic, it's all over the place and it's dark. How am I supposed to trust it to save your life?! How do I know it's not going to kill you?" Emma's furrowed brow and quivering lip left no question about just how little faith she had in this plan as she continued to stare helplessly at Regina like she was hoping the more experienced sorceress would be able to suddenly muster up a much simpler one. She watched as Regina lifted the hand that wasn't linked with her own and brought it to cup Emma's cheek in an entirely un-Regina-like gesture before bringing her fingertips to Emma's temple and pressing down, mimicking what she had done with Emma's fingers earlier. Regina closed her eyes for a brief moment and listened as Emma's thoughts become clear to her once more. And there it was, that same sentence running on a loop through Emma's subconscious.

_'I can't lose you, I love you."_

When her eyes opened that certain something was back, that look that Emma couldn't put her finger on. She had no idea what Regina was thinking or why that look made her heart flutter, but she couldn't pull her eyes away if she'd wanted to.

"I trust you."

Three shocking little words were all Regina said before the hand holding Emma's slammed them down and into her chest, returning her heart to its rightful place. It took only seconds before her magic sparked, igniting with a roar, and only another beat of her spasming heart before the pain arrived, swift and fierce. If either of them were capable of being aware of anything other than the all-consuming agony they would have realized they were screaming, inhuman cries tearing apart the stillness of the night.


	5. Chapter 5

The first thing Regina became aware of as her mind drifted back to consciousness was that she was cold, bitingly and bitterly cold. The second was that she was alone, lying on what felt like wet earth. The third, and most disturbing, was that there was no warm and reassuring beating within her chest-it was empty. Immediately, a deep and unsettling panic began to set in, her mind clearing a little faster as it worked to piece together her memories of the night through the fog of exhaustion. If her heart had been present it would have stuttered and skipped as she recalled her damning injuries and the incredible amount of magic she'd had to push Emma to use to heal her. As her eyes blinked open and she moved to sit up, Regina discovered the world around her still bathed in the depths of night and, after a quick scan of her surroundings, found that she was indeed completely alone, no Savior in sight. She felt her stomach drop at the thought of the kind of power that it had taken to heal her and what that could have done to the newly-anointed Dark One. No one knew better than she what a thrilling, intoxicating rush accompanied magic of that intensity, and the possibilities of what a crazed, magic fueled, unstable Emma Swan might want with her heart were terrifying, to say the least. Her right hand had, at some point while she was lost in the cascade of mental images of the terrible things the Dark One might do with such a prize, found its way to her breast bone and was rubbing anxious circles over the empty cavity below. Her breathing became shallower and shallower, despite her best efforts to remain calm and clear her head of the ever increasing panic, and as she attempted to stand Regina found her legs simply would not cooperate and instead turned to quaking jelly beneath her. It was on her third failed attempt to stand, managing only to make it to her hands and knees, that her gasps turned to sobs. Never in her life had she felt so out of control, so weak, and so exposed. If she been able to think clearly at all she would have questioned why she was so shaken by her current predicament. It was bad, there was no mistaking the danger she was in or the danger others could be in should the Dark One choose to use her heart for manipulation and control, but she was not without at least some power to fight back. Fighting with Emma Swan, the pesky and ever butting-in where Regina thought she didn't belong Savior, was second nature to her and something Regina had made into rather an art form, yet all she seemed able to do was sputter and sob, certain that wherever her heart was it must be breaking-though for what or why she couldn't say. Suddenly, and to Regina's complete and utter shock, a desperate voice broke through the silence of the forest around her and halted her spiraling thoughts in their tracks.

"Regina! Regina!" The sound of underbrush snapping and splintering under stumbled footsteps drew Regina's eye to a particularly thick cluster of overgrown brambles where, much to her surprise...and relief...tangled blonde locks were emerging from the darkness. Emma's eyes were wild, her arms crossed, hugging something protectively to her chest as she staggered free of the trees. Their gazes locked and for long seconds they simply stared into each other's eyes, the only sounds those of the staggered gasps accompanying Regina's ebbing sobs, and the rasping of Emma's winded, heaving chest. It was, of course, Regina who recovered first, swallowing down a final sob and attempting to reign in her fear before she spoke, fist still clutched to her aching breast.

"Miss..." Regina paused, taking another steadying breath, "Emma, what exactly is going on here?"

At first, Emma said nothing, seeming not to have even heard Regina. It wasn't until Regina's gaze fell to the object in her hands that Emma startled back to life, her eyes darting down and back up again.

"I...I...it just, I wasn't going to...I wanted to be sure...but it's, I didn't mean to take it, I mean...here!" Emma thrust out her hands, fingers uncurling from around the glowing organ within, proffering it up for Regina to take. Regina reached out hesitantly, unsure of how to read the situation, but before her fingers could find their way to her rapidly pulsing heart she pulled back ever so slightly and cocked her head, studying Emma's expression carefully.

"Emma" she spoke softly, waiting for Emma to meet her eyes before continuing. "What is going on here?" Echoing her earlier question as she lowered her outstretched hand, awaiting Emma's explanation. She watched as Emma's expression shifted from something akin to a deer in the headlights to...was it, embarrassment tinged perhaps with a bit of cautious fear?

"I'm sorry Regina, I can't imagine what you're thinking...or well, I guess I can imagine exactly what you're thinking." Emma's eyes flickered to the heart again, it's pulsing becoming ever so slightly less frantic, and then back to meet Regina's own. "It's just, I woke up before you and you were...fine, as far as I could tell, just out cold. When I realized we didn't seem much closer to daybreak I thought I should look for shelter, you know, cause I don't really know what might be out here with us, and with you unconscious I wanted to be sure we'd be safe...or safer." Her expression was sheepish as her eyes darted from Regina's, to the heart, then off into the dark, and Regina could tell Emma would be fidgeting were her hands not otherwise occupied. Regina found herself touched, oddly endeared by the way Emma was so clearly nervously awaiting her reaction, almost as if she was worried that Regina would think her silly, or not approve.

 _"Since when has Emma cared whether or not I approved of her actions?"_ she thought, one eyebrow arching as she pondered the question. Before she could decide on a response, Emma continued.

"I didn't mean to take your heart, Regina." If it was possible, Regina's eyebrow moved even further up along her forehead. Emma caught the look and a small anxious laugh escaped her lips. "Ok, I MEANT to take it, but not like, steal it. I was just...worried?" Regina rocked back on her heels, trying to look more regal and composed despite her place on the forest floor with tear-stained cheeks and clothes torn and caked in equal parts drying blood and dirt. Something about Emma's questioning doubt stung, digging into old wounds where Regina felt the ever present lack of belief in her own ability to be good, to be trusted.

"And what exactly could you possibly have been worried about, Miss Swan? That I might awake and find you gone and what? Simply return to your _Charming_ parents and inform them that I'd lost their precious bundle of joy in the woods? That I'd convince them you were a hopeless case, not that they'd ever listen, and persuade the merry band of idiots to leave you out here? Do you really still think so little of me after all we've been through?" Her tone was harsh and her arms crossed against her chest in a useless attempt to shield an organ that wasn't even there from any further damage, yet an inkling of the hurt whimper she desperately tried to cover with her biting words crept out all the same and reached Emma's ears.

"No Regina, I was afraid you wouldn't." Emma eyes were fixed solidly on Regina's heart now, staring at it with such unreadable intensity that Regina could feel it in her bones, causing a strangely warm shiver to streak up her spine.

"Afraid I wouldn't what? Wouldn't abandon you? Honestly, Miss Swan, you're not making any sense." She was exasperated, confused and tired of the throbbing in her brain and in the heart that she shouldn't even be able to feel so strongly, a throbbing telling her that she was reading this all wrong...that something huge was happening inside the whirling mind of the woman in front of her, certain that she wasn't ready for whatever it was. Suddenly Emma's eyes were on her again, red rimmed and fierce.

"God Regina, no! I was afraid you wouldn't wake up at all!" Her voice, raw already from the events of the evening, screeched out, cracking and clawing against the silence of the night air. "You didn't see yourself! You were dying in my arms, you were basically dead, and then you were in my head and you we talking and telling me I was your only chance." Emma fell to her knees before Regina, finally at eye level and her voice quieting slightly. "That magic, Regina, it was like nothing I could ever imagine. Even the darkness didn't hurt that badly when it took me. It was like I could feel every torn piece of you, every leaking vein, and I could feel it all as I, as WE fixed it, but my god it was like my own body was tearing in half to put you back together..." Her eyes misted over and the emotions hitting Regina were too much, the care in Emma's words too deep.

"Well I'm sorry to have been such a pain to save, next time I'm dying I won't..." but she was cut off as Emma suddenly slammed her hands to Regina's chest, resettling her heart deep inside, but refusing to pull back. Regina gasped, her lungs misfiring as her heart stitched itself back into place, still wrapped in Emma's freezing fingers.

"I would do it all again! I would do it a million times over!" Emma's voice was a scathing whisper, harsh, and spoken oh so close to Regina's face. "Don't you see? Can't you feel it??" As if emphasizing her words, Emma fingers gave a steady squeeze around her heart and Regina cried out, though oddly not in pain...in something...more. Her head fell forward, forehead against Emma's, the emotions cascading over her, clenching her heart far harder than Emma's grip, echoed something long forgotten, something so distant she couldn't quite latch on to what it was. It was all too heavy, too tight, and she wondered if after everything it was going to be this, whatever this was, that would finally prove too much for her battered heart. If this would be the moment she broke under the weight of it all and slipped away. That thought was almost comforting, her death somehow less frightening than the feelings she felt dancing from the fingertips within her chest.

"Emma..." she breathed, the word coming out raspy and dry, her eyes squeezed tightly shut lest she open them to find bright green burning into her, so close now that there would be no escape.

"I can't let you go Regina. I need you." It was those three words, "I need you", that snapped Regina's eyes open, bringing to the surface that unexpected mantra she'd nearly forgotten she'd heard when she'd entered Emma's mind. Shaking fingers left the place on her thighs where they'd been gripping so tightly she was sure she'd have bruises, and gently, hesitantly, found their way to Emma's temple once more. Green eyes slid shut and there it was again, louder this time, booming through Regina's skull.

_"I can't lose you. I love you."_

The two woman stayed perfectly still, composing a stunning, horrifically beautiful tableau amidst the leaves and the stars, bodies weaved intimately together at heart and mind, chests heaving in tune with one another.

"You love me." The words were out before she knew she'd formed them, barely above a breath but audible in the air between them, hanging there waiting to be caught and acknowledged. There were tears in her eyes and a sinking in her stomach, despair at the knowledge of something Regina simply couldn't believe was true.

"I love you." Emma admission confirmed Regina's words, slipped from her lips with a certainty even she didn't know she felt until just that moment. Regina shook her head, tears dripping down her cheeks now, following the tracks of the many that had gone before.

"No, Emma," once again she found herself cut off by this irritating Savior who just kept wedging herself further and further into Regina's life, into her thoughts, and now very literally into her chest and under the protective cage of ribs that had failed so often to keep the heart beneath them safe. But this time it was different. This time it wasn't antagonizing words spewed from curled lips to challenge her, a glare from emerald eyes that refused to back down in the presence of a Queen, or even a fist aimed at her chin to knock her from her high horse. This time it was a gentle rush of air against her cheek, the subtle nudge of a nose under her own, turning her face ever so slightly skyward, and then the incredible pressure of lips against hers. She could have sworn that her heart stopped completely in that moment, swelling with a heat it didn't know what to do with and nearly bursting. Emma was gentle in her kiss and Regina could feel every inch of the blonde shaking as she leaned in further, applying just enough pressure to ensure Regina knew what this was and what it meant. Regina's hand fell from Emma's temple and pushed back on her chest, forcing Emma's lips to part from hers just enough to free her lips to form words again.

"You can't love me Emma." Her chest was heaving, the warmth burning out from her heart and into her limbs, but still her fears surged forward. _I can't be loved. I'm unlovable. My only chance is Robin, because he thinks I'm his one true love and he won't give that up. I hurt everything I love. She can't love me. Villains don't get happy endings. I don't get a happy ending._ "You can't love me. How could you?"

With a slight quirk of her head, a shy crooked smile, and a gentle furrowing of raised eyebrows, Emma was suddenly the spitting image of the woman who had arrived on Regina's doorstep all those years before. The memory of her then, all red leather and bouncing curls, "Hi" said ever so awkwardly, bursting inside of Regina along with a thousand jumbled regrets and questions about how they could have possibly gotten here. Hands, no longer cold but burning, slowly extracted themselves from her chest, abandoning her heart to beat on its own, and found their way to cupping her cheeks.

"Oh Regina, how could I not?"                                                                                                                                   


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello readers! I'm so glad to be posting this one here as well as ff.net now, and I do hope you're enjoying it.  
> I have a request. I would LOVE some fan art of people's favorite scenes from this story so far. You can find me here or on tumblr (http://jumpthethunder.tumblr.com/) in order to get it to me. I would just love to see the way my writing looks in the heads of some of the amazing artists out here. I will pick my favorite and make it the cover art for this fic. Get in touch if you want to participate and have something you want to send my way! Thanks!

Emma could feel the fear radiating off of Regina in waves. She steadied her shaking hands, trying to convey a confidence and strength she hardly felt. She couldn't deny her own distress, her own fear at what was happening in this night so full of unexpected things. Yet oddly there was one thing, one hysteria inducing problem that seemed to somehow have been shoved into the background. The darkness, the crushing, suffocating darkness had been forced back, edging around the periphery, still there but less so, and that was enough...for now.  Regina's eyes had slammed shut the second Emma's last words found their way to her ears and hadn't opened yet, her head moved ever so slightly, back and forth, negating Emma's sentiment. Emma knew she should say something else, that the silence between them was going on too long, becoming too thick, too heavy, but she just...couldn't. She wasn't even sure where her confession of love had come from in the first place, or well, she was sure, it came directly from her heart, but where that perplexing little organ had gotten the impression that she was in love, and with Regina no less, now that was a mystery. Despite the fact that both women seemed to have been struck momentarily mute, neither pulled away, both unwilling to let go of the warmth they found in the other's touch. With every passing breath, Emma felt her courage and clarity slipping away.

 _"What am I doing? What did I just do? How could I...Regina has Robin! Robin is her true love! Oh my god, she's going to think I'm doing this to take away her happy ending, again! No, no no no...that's not what I meant. I didn't...but...I love her? Where did that even come from?"_ Emma shook her head, limp waves tumbling around her shoulders, trying to calm the flurry of thoughts. She needed to find the right thing to say, something to keep this precious moment from shattering. Despite having not the slightest clue as to where she wanted this to go, what she did know was that they were on shaky ground. Regina was...unpredictable, at best, when she felt threatened and, with her own magic fizzing and popping just beneath the surface like a live wire, Emma knew that one wrong move could set them both ablaze, quite literally. While her brain was still stuck trying to puzzle out the best course of action, her body decided it knew just what it wanted and moved without permission, closing the gap between them once more and placing whisper-soft kisses to Regina's eyelids.

"Stop." The word slipped out, solid and harsh, hanging between their still close faces like a wall. Emma pulled back, Regina's eyes open now and staring back at her with an intensity that burned. Regina began to move, backing uncharacteristically clumsily away on her knees and nearly stumbling as she worked to get to her feet. As soon as the contact with Regina broke, Emma could feel the darkness rushing back in, so much stronger than before. It seemed there was a price to pay for the magic they'd used to save Regina's life. Emma tumbled back, landing on her ass, feet scrambling, pushing her through the dirt until her back hit a nearby tree.

"Regina, I'm sorry. I'm so, I didn't mean, I mean...I don't know, I just..." Her words came out nearly as jumbled as her thoughts as the murmuring, hissing voices clawed their way back into her mind. The vile whispers turned into shouts, the din echoing around her skull and drowning out every other thought and feeling and sound.

Immediately, Regina sensed the change in Emma. The clear headed, albeit anxious and emotional woman who she had just been being kissed by (and whom, she was stunned to realize, she had been kissing back) was gone, replaced by a shrinking, shaking figure with darting eyes and twitching hands. She watched in grotesque awe as Emma slipped right past the frantic state she'd found her in back in the castle hall and right to the edge of unhinged madness. It was astounding how quickly the change happened, eye losing focus, fingers clawing at flesh and dirt, lips spilling retorts at some unseen tormentor. Between her pain at seeing Emma drowning in darkness and her bone-deep exhaustion from just barely having survived her earlier injuries, Regina found herself struggling to maintain a handle on what she was watching. It all seemed too quick, too strange, but then again they weren't in Storybrooke anymore, with its muted version of magic. The words she'd said and thought so many times over the past few years, " _Magic is different here_ ", came back to haunt her, instantly reminding her that magic was, indeed, quite different _here_. Here magic was strong and had a will of its own. Here magic took as much as it gave. Here was where magic lived. And now, with her physical connection to Regina cut off for the first time since she had floated up to her in that tree, it seemed that the magic invading Emma's body was consuming her, ingesting her from the inside faster than she could possibly fight it off. And the strangest thing about it all, taking Regina completely by surprise when perhaps, after everything, it really shouldn't, was that she could _feel_ Emma, her Emma ( _hers? When had she started thinking of Emma as hers?)_ , slipping away. She could feel it as if a part of her own soul were being torn away, as if the last of the lingering light in her heart was being snuffed out. It was only then, as she watched Emma clutching at her scalp so hard that ruby red blood began to pool around her nails, that Regina remembered the dagger. If she'd had the time to think she would have scoffed at herself for her earlier panic upon finding her heart missing along with the Savior. Yes, with the Dark One in possession of her heart she would have been at Emma's mercy, but she was certainly not without a leg to stand on as long as that dagger remained with her. But there was no time to think about that now, nor was there time to dwell on why she could practically hear the voices in Emma's head as if they were in her own. What she needed to do now was get them somewhere she could control, give herself a leg up to tackle whatever the hell it was that was happening between them. This night had done nothing by spiral further and further into unknown and uncharted territory so far and Regina was getting damn sick of feeling so out of her element. She reached into her partially torn jacket pocket, relieved to find the dagger still inside, and wrapped her fingers tightly around it's cool metal hilt. When she spoke it was with the voice of the mayor, clear and commanding, unwilling to budge for anyone and as devoid of emotion as she could manage. This was no time for her heart to be doing the talking, this was a time for cooler heads and reason to prevail unless she wanted to see herself end up skewered by another tree, or worse.

"Emma Swan. Dark One. I command you to relinquish control to me. You will not fight my magic, you will do as it desires."

Emma froze immediately, her eyes locking on to the dagger as Regina slowly extracted it from her jacket before moving to meet Regina's gaze. Neither woman openly acknowledged the surprising way their magic immediately reached out for one another's, nor the spreading heat that the entwining energies induced low in both of their bellies in reaction to Regina's words, almost as  if gleefully excited...or even aroused. Regina could feel Emma's magic dancing across her skin, stroking along her arms and causing the fine hairs there to stand on end before moving to the sensitive flesh of her neck. It was testing the boundaries, feeling it's way around, trying to gauge when it had pushed too far, disobeying Regina's magic and her command to the point of being roughly tossed back to its owner. It was erotic in a way that Regina tried to write off as being nothing more than a response to the power her darkness craved with such a ferocity that it was almost enough to cause her to forget what she was trying to do. As it was, the slightest moan slipped from between parted lips before she managed to regain her composure, scowling at the panting blonde still seated on the forest floor, face now ever-so-slightly flushed and eyes glazed.

"Miss Swan, control your magic." Regina's tone was clipped and her words had an immediate impact, sending Emma's wandering energy recoiling and causing her blush to increase exponentially. Before she could murmur the "sorry" that was so clearly forming in her mouth, Regina twirled a hand elegantly and they instantly vanished in a swirl of purple.

* * *

When the fog of purple cleared, Emma found herself looking around at an unfamiliar room. Though it was most certainly a castle, it did not resemble that of King Arthur in the slightest. She let her eyes take in the decor, the intricate stonework and massive fireplace, the domed glass ceiling and open-air balcony. She realized in that moment that she knew this place, she had been here before. It had been another night full of the unpleasant and unexpected, when she'd had the misfortune to run afoul of a very different version of the woman across the room who her eyes now settled on.

"Well, that's more like it." Regina said, talking mostly to herself, as she dusted off what she was now wearing, an outfit Emma assumed was one of the former Evil Queen's more muted wardrobe choices. She turned to look at Emma, who stood stock still where she had landed, right in the center of the Evil Queen's dressing chamber. Emma was about to wonder why the voices haunting her were remaining so, well, not absent exactly but...muted, when the light glinting off the dagger tucked into the waistband of Regina's skin-tight black leather pants caught her eye.

 _"The ones you love the most..."_ someone, or something whispered. Perhaps it was her own thoughts this time, or maybe just another taunt from the insatiable imp. _"There's a connection there. It could save you. She could save you. Or it'll be the end of her."_ This time the words were followed by a cruelly gleeful giggle and she knew exactly who that sound belonged to.

"Gold" she snarled, her voice coming out in a threatening growl. Only when she saw the deep frown lines appear and watched as Regina cocked her head to one side, regarding her apprehensively, did Emma fully realize she'd spoken aloud to a man (a creature, really) who was not presently in attendance.

"Sorry." Emma said sheepishly, her pointer finger coming up to tap at her temple as she shrugged, "All's not so quiet in here."

"I know." Regina replied simply, tugging again at her waistcoat as if trying to straighten unseen wrinkles. The expression on her face told Emma there was far more to her statement than those two little words let on, but the way she fiddled with her clothing also let on how little she was prepared to talk about it. Shaking her head for what must be the thousandth time that evening, Emma decided to change the subject.

"So, your bedroom huh? Why here? Why not just take me back to Arthur's and let Hook deal with my drama?" Her attempt at brevity only caused a scowl to cross Regina's features before her expression became almost comically quizzical.

"Not my bedroom exactly, Dear, but how, might I ask, do you know where we are?" Regina moved forward as she spoke, taking a seat on the chaise near the fireplace and attempting to look far more at home than she felt.

"Oh, I...um...I thought you'd remember..." Emma trailed off, completely uncertain of how much to reveal of her encounter with the former Queen. She had always just assumed that what she had altered in the past during her misadventure in the Enchanted Forest with Hook had also changed the way her fairy-tale family remembered things. Regina crinkled her nose as her eyes scrunched up in contemplation, clearly trying to sort out what it was Emma was referring to. Eventually a look of slight recognition began to dawn across her features.

"You...you were here? That Princess, what was her name?"

"Leia" Emma filled in while kicking at the ground with the toe of her shoe.

"Yes, that waif in the utterly out of fashion red dress at the ball, the one who assisted Snow White! That was you, of course!" Regina sat up straighter, piecing together the events of the night with a mischievous twinkle in her eye, muttering something about how she would have seen right through that ridiculous glamour had the _real_ her been there (though what made today's Regina more real than her past self, Emma wasn't sure), and how, if nothing else, the color of the dress would have been a dead giveaway. Almost as quickly as her merriment at discovering this little undercover caper of Emma's had arrived, it faded with what Emma could only assume was the arrival of the memories of what had happened once the Queen had gotten her captive back to her castle. Regina looked up, pain and guilt showing clearly on her face, and clasped her hands around one of Emma's, pulling her down to sit beside her.

 "Why didn't you ever say anything?" Though there were many things Emma thought Regina might say at that moment, she had to admit that that was not one of the ones that crossed her mind.

"Regina...it was, there was a lot going on, you know? I mean, I came back and you weren't her, you weren't that woman anymore, you aren't that woman anymore. And then with everything with Robin and Marian, it just didn't seem like anything that needed to be brought up. I always sort of figured that if you wanted to talk about it, you would. It wasn't my place to push it. Back then I was just trying to get my friend back, I didn't want to give us anything else to fight about."

Regina seemed to take a minute to absorb what Emma had said before speaking.

"Those memories, Emma, I had them but they weren't...clear...or new. What I mean to say is they simply slid in where the old ones had been as something that happened many, many years ago. And, much as it pains me to say it, that night was not actually anything terribly remarkable for me, so those memories didn't stand out as anything worth dwelling on." The two women's hands remained linked, resting in Regina's lap, a sort of peace settling in Emma's mind at the physical connection despite the touchy subject matter at hand. Emma smirked at Regina, cocking one eyebrow,

"Nothing memorable about flirting with innocent princesses you've taken prisoner, your Majesty?" Her use of the title, the one the former Regina had insisted upon, made Regina flinch.

"Flirting with and torturing innocent princesses, you mean." Regina corrected. There was no self-pity in her tone, though a slight edge of self-loathing didn't go unnoticed.

"No, Regina, look, don't do that, ok?" Emma placed a hand under Regina's chin, tilting her face so they could look directly at one another. "I'm alright, and honestly I've been through worse. You can't blame yourself for that. I got myself into that situation. It wasn't even like it was really you."

"But it was **_really_** me, Miss Swan? Or have you forgotten that I was that woman for many years. She's still a part of me, always there, in the back of my mind, all the time...not unlike the disgusting little imp whispering to you in the back of yours." Emma was about to interrupt, to ask how Regina knew what was going on in her head, but Regina plowed ahead. "You say you've been through worse, but that was because of her, because of **_me_** as well. You never would have been through anything so cruel or painful had it not been for me." Regina pulled her hands away then, standing and retreating to the far side of the fireplace before flicking her fingers and igniting it, despite the complete lack of firewood within. Emma knew where Regina's mind was going as she stared into the fire. It was drifting back to that night not so long ago for her, but oh so far in the past for Regina. She remembered with incredible clarity the way the Queen had looked at her like she was the most delicious looking meal she'd ever seen. Emma had been more than a little surprised, and a bit flattered, until she remembered the glamour and the fact that she didn't actually look like herself. Regina wasn't attracted to Emma, if she were truly attracted at all and not just acting, manipulating what she saw as little more than a possible stepping stone on her path to her real target, Snow White, or, at the very least, a pesky bug to squash along her way. Thinking back on it, Emma realized how naive she'd been to even entertain the Queen's attention. That was not, after all, the Regina she was skilled at dealing with, but instead a younger, angrier, and far more dangerous version, and not one she had any right nor sense getting involved with. When her affections had failed to entice Emma to give up what little she knew of the bandit Snow White, Regina had turned violent, though the Queen had been careful not to leave a visible mark on her body. It seemed magic had many a way of inflicting excruciating physical pain without causing any lasting bodily harm. Emma had counted herself lucky when a guard had knocked, whispering news of Snow's whereabouts to the Queen and causing her to relinquish Emma to the dungeons to await a morning execution.

 _"See what you're doing to her? Bringing out the worst. You always do. You're taking her back to the darkness..."_ with Regina's distance, both mental and physical, came the voices, awakening and growing louder as the teased and taunted.

"No!" Emma snapped, once again not realizing she was speaking out loud. "I won't let you touch her. I will keep her safe from the darkness!" She began to smack herself in the head, trying to bash out the voices, barely aware that she had stood and begun backing away from the chaise, the fireplace, and Regina. Her behavior had not gone unnoticed, nor her words unheard, by the other woman, however, and she was now approaching Emma cautiously. With every step closer she came, the voices got louder and meaner, their tone like nails on a chalkboard.

 _"You made her hurt you then, just like you'll make her hurt you now. You'll destroy her. You'll destroy everything you love!"_ She squeezed her eyes shut as tightly as she could, trying to make it all stop.

"Emma." Regina's tone was gentle and oh-so-near, so much nearer than she had been only seconds before. And then there were arms around her, holding her tightly in what must have been the most awkward, and most needed, hug she'd ever received. With a thunderous cry the voices vanished, replaced by the soothing timber of apologies and tender words and fingers stroking through her hair.

"Please, stop Emma. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, for everything. This was never your darkness to carry. I'm so, so sorry, my dear."

"I can't do this Regina. I can't fight the darkness. I'm no Savior, not really. It'll take me and when it does it's going to come after you. You need to stay away from me." Emma tried to squirm from Regina's grasp but her hold was unrelenting. Finally she managed to pull back just enough to look into Regina's eyes, holding her gaze with an incredible seriousness. "You need to get away from me. Get away and stay away." Regina surprised her by smiling back, a half smile that someone lit up a kindness in her eyes that Emma had only seen when she looked at Henry.

"It would seem I have to do just the opposite, my dear. I know those voices in your head, the darkness calling out to you, gets worse when we're apart. I can't explain why, or how, not yet, but I can feel it in you, Emma, and I won't let it take you while there's something I can do about it." There was silence for long moments while they continued to regard one another. Finally, Regina spoke again, "What were you thinking when you took this on for me, Emma? It was meant for me, and less than I deserve, according to many." Her fingers pushed unruly blonde locks out of Emma's eyes and tucked them gently behind her ear. Emma raised on shaking hand, tracing it gently along Regina's jaw before ever so hesitantly running a finger across her lips, tracing the scar that marred the tender flesh. In words barely loud enough to be audible she stated, as if it were the answer to everything and the most obvious thing in all the worlds,

"You've worked too hard to have your happiness destroyed."

**Author's Note:**

> Comments/Reviews make me a very happy person, please leave your thoughts! I appreciate everything from constructive critiques to shameless praise :D


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